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Pre-reed week 2
What is this week’s tool?
We will cover several tools to deal with unhelpful thinking in the following two weeks (Weeks 3 and 4), including:
Identifying automatic thoughts
Changing your perspective (aka cognitive restructuring from traditional CBT) Scheduled worry/rumination time (from traditional CBT)
Some of these tools fit better for certain situations or people, and none of them are a panacea. So, having all of them in your toolkit will maximize your flexibility and enable you to apply whichever works best at any given moment.
This week we will begin with identifying thoughts, scheduling worry/rumination time, and practicing cognitive restructuring.
Why use these tools?
Unhelpful beliefs and interpretations often lead to disproportionately negative emotions or harmful behaviors. When our thoughts are biased towards the negative, we may feel worse, treat others and ourselves worse, or avoid activities and situations that we actually value.
On the other hand, unrealistically positive thoughts can cause problems, too: we may act impulsively or seek out pleasure without considering the risks or downsides. Our thoughts can also be distracting and unpleasant when we get stuck inside them—that is, when we worry or ruminate.7
Therefore, it can be helpful to develop more balanced and adaptive thinking. This is characterized by the ability to take multiple perspectives into account, accept reality, and, when needed, disengage from repetitive thought to take the next healthy and caring action.
The goal is not to brainwash yourself into believing something that’s not true! It is neither to ignore negativity nor to fake positivity. Sometimes adaptive thinking means holding a more balanced and accurate belief, and sometimes it means acknowledging that a difficult thought is actually true or that we can’t change that thought and must instead find a way to move forward anyway.
1. Identify Your Automatic Thoughts
Just because you think something, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s true.
When you notice your mood getting worse, or you find yourself engaging in unhelpful behavior, ask yourself, “What’s going through my mind right now?” or “What am I thinking just now?” and, as soon as possible, jot down the thought or mental image.
Optional: Sometimes it may be difficult to pinpoint or define a thought. The video on the right (3 min) can give some examples that may be helpful to you.
7 Worry and rumination are both forms of repetitive thought in which your brain tries to solve a problem by thinking about what could go wrong, trying to figure out the cause of the problem, scolding you, etc. They are often classified as “unproductive repetitive thought” because they just beget more “what ifs” and rarely resolve the issue. They are sometimes accompanied by a feeling of being stuck or not having control over the thoughts.
Another way to get in touch and identify your thoughts is by paying attention to changes in your feelings and/or bodily sensations. For instance, you may notice that you have been feeling upset and unmotivated, as well as that your body feels tired and you have a headache.
When you notice these feelings and sensations, ask yourself “What might be triggering these feelings and/or sensations?” and “Can I connect these feelings to anything I have been thinking about recently?” Alternatively, as before, you might ask yourself again "What's going through my mind right now?” or “What am I thinking just now?”.
Let’s take some time to journal some of our automatic thoughts. You may use the box below or your own notebook to record your more automatic inclinations.
Journal for automatic thoughts
Write Write Write Write
Here are some examples of the kinds of thoughts that can be distorted, along with some alternative, more adaptive versions of these thoughts.
We have put these thoughts into three categories:
If these categories aren’t intuitive to you, you do not have to sort your thoughts into them – it only matters that you are able to identify a variety of thoughts.
Note that the adaptive thoughts provided are just one way to respond to the troubling thoughts; they might be helpful to one person and not another. There is no one right response!
Your automatic reaction/ interpretations of events
Your alternative, more adaptive responses
I’m jumping to a conclusion. There could be so many reasons I wasn’t chosen for this role. Even if I didn’t meet the interviewer’s criteria, it could be because I needed skills or credentials that I can develop, not because of my inherent intelligence.
And hey, even if I’m not as smart as some people in EA, there are tons of people who aren’t geniuses who still manage to have a positive impact on the world. Maybe I can talk to a career advisor who can help me figure out my next steps.
I have probably told myself this 100 times, and it has never been true. The cravings will only go away if I can sit through them long enough for my compulsion to lessen. This craving feels really bad right now, but it will pass. Is there some other physical need causing it? Am I thirsty?
If she is trying to hurt me, it’s probably because she has been hurt herself. If I assume she’s trying to hurt me for malicious reasons and react angrily, it will just escalate the situation. Maybe once I calm down, I can listen compassionately to her and find out what’s going on.
It’s true that I probably need to sustain a bit more work time in order to hold the kinds of jobs I want. But given how much I’m struggling right now, I’m likely holding myself to an unrealistically high standard.
In fact, lots of company executives get less than three hours of “real” work done in a day! Let me identify steps I can take to care for myself and increase my capacity, and I’ll focus on those things as my goal, as I’ll only be able to increase my productivity from that baseline.
I’ll measure my capacity increase instead of my working hours for now, since that is only leading me to beat myself up and feel stuck.
Your worries (about the current state of things or about the future)
Your alternative, more adaptive responses
Obsessing about this isn’t doing me any good—whether or not this is true, and it is likely an exaggerated fear, it’s not an actionable worry. All I can do is take care of my body and brain from now on, including by getting enough rest and trying to reduce my anxiety.
No one is guaranteed to have any set amount of impact. All I can do is make the best choices I can, given the information I have, and try to live a balanced life where I pursue impact alongside my own wellbeing.
Even if I don’t change the world, I can affect myself and those around me, and that makes my life worth living.
That could happen, but if so, I can build a happy life with lots of worthwhile non-romantic relationships. I could also meet someone tomorrow or many years from now; it is impossible to predict.
Whether I meet the right person is not totally within my control, so let me focus instead on building fulfilling connections of all kinds.
Core beliefs
Your alternative, more adaptive responses
I am inherently and unconditionally worthy.
Some people are highly competent and some people make mistakes that bother me; most people are capable of both. People who make mistakes are still valuable humans. I am also a valuable human who makes mistakes.
I can meet my needs and support others. My wellbeing and positive utility are inherently important. Plus, by meeting my needs, I am serving as a good role-model for self-care to others.
Most of us are just making it up as we go along. My way of making it up is working just fine!
It is important to clarify that most of the time, our thoughts don’t appear verbally as fully formed sentences in our head. They are often more implicit.
For example, instead of thinking the words “maybe she’s mad at me,” you might notice yourself automatically reacting as if your friend is mad: Tensing up and feeling anxious, thinking about apologizing or making excuses, searching your memory for what you might have done wrong ... and from these reactions, you can infer that you are assuming your friend is mad at you.
Core beliefs, in particular, often appear as more of a “felt truth.” Turning our implicit thoughts into explicit, verbal statements is the first step in dealing with them, as it allows us to see them clearly— and sometimes just verbalizing implicit thoughts can bring us a bit of peace right away.
Let’s examine our automatic thoughts in relation to one of our program goals.
Choose one of your initial goals for participating in this program (as identified in Week 1) and then use this choice to answer this week’s reflection questions.
My goal:
Now, with this goal in mind try to answer this week’s reflection questions.
What are some thoughts that are involved in the pattern you are trying to change?
a. Reactions to, or interpretations of, events
b. Worries
c. Core beliefs
This week’s tools can help break the thought-emotion and thought-behavior links in the CBT cycle. Many of the tools should help you recognize your thought patterns, update the thoughts, and replace them with more balanced, helpful, and accurate ones.
2. Challenge your thoughts with cognitive restructuring
To work on our automatic thoughts, we can use one of CBT’s most effective exercises called cognitive restructuring. Please check out this example to learn how to use it. Then, use the cognitive restructuring worksheet to come up with a more balanced, but still believable, thought. Whenever your unhelpful thought arises in the future, remind yourself of the new and improved thought (alternative response).
You may find reviewing these examples of cognitive restructuring helpful before trying this exercise on your own. It can also be beneficial to focus your practice on an area in which you want to make progress in life, such as managing procrastination, worries, or self-esteem.
We highly recommend that you write down your answers when you complete the cognitive restructuring worksheet. Writing things down will help you analyze the thought and see how you develop a more balanced perspective throughout the process; it may even allow you to witness the change in your emotions. For your first practice, please review the example below, and then you can use the cognitive restructuring worksheet to practice.
Cognitive Restructuring Template
1. Think about a recent event or situation that caused you distress, anxiety, or negative emotions. Write down the details of this event/situation.
I need to finish a report due next week, but I keep avoiding it by scrolling on social media or watching the news.
2. Identify the immediate thoughts that went through your mind during or after the situation. Ask yourself: What was I thinking or telling myself during this time? How strongly did you believe each thought? Rate your belief in each thought on a scale of 0-100, with 100 being full belief.
I don’t even know where to start. (90), It’s going to take forever. (50), I’ll mess it up anyway. (70)
3. Identify and rate the emotions you felt during or after the situation (e.g., anxiety, fear, sadness). Rate the intensity of each emotion on a scale of 0-100, with 100 being extreme intensity. To help you with labeling your emotions, you may use the ‘Feeling Wheel’ *(by Dr. Gloria Willcox).
Anxiety (70), Overwhelm (80), Guilt (60)
4. Question the accuracy of your automatic thoughts by using these prompts:
What is the evidence supporting this thought?
The topic I am working on is complicated, and I don’t fully understand some parts.I’ve procrastinated before and struggled to meet deadlines.
What is the evidence against this thought?
I’ve written papers before, even on difficult topics. I can likely do it again.
What’s the worst that could happen, and would I survive it?
Worst case scenario: I don’t finish the report on time, and I get negative feedback.
Would I survive it? Yes. It might feel uncomfortable and disappointing in the moment, but I could explain my situation to my supervisor, ask for an extension, or learn from the experience to improve my time management for the next report.
What’s the best that could happen?
Best case scenario: I start working on the paper today, finish it early, and feel proud of my effort. The paper turns out well, and I get positive feedback, boosting my confidence.
Is there an alternative explanation to my automatic thought?
I’m avoiding the task because I feel overwhelmed or unsure where to start, not because I lack ability. Breaking the task into smaller steps might help.
What is the most likely scenario?
I’ll start working on the paper, and although it might not be perfect at first, I will make progress. I’ll finish it by the deadline, and it will likely be good enough to meet the requirements.
If my friend were in this situation, what would I tell them?
Don’t worry about making it perfect right now. Just start with something small, like an outline or the introduction. You’ve handled difficult tasks before, and you’ll manage this one too. Take it one step at a time, and remember to give yourself credit for your effort.
5. Based on your answers above to question 4, try to rewrite your first automatic thought in a more balanced way.
I don’t have to finish the whole paper right now. I can just start with one section, even if it’s not perfect. I know I will feel better once I’ve started.
6. Reassess your emotions based on the new, balanced thought. Rate the intensity of each emotion again (0- 100).
Anxiety (30), Overwhelm (50), Guilt (0)
3. Schedule worry/rumination time
Scheduling time for worry and rumination can also train your brain to let go of trying to “solve the problem” all day long, since you know each thought will be addressed at a specific time later on. This may also be the time you set aside to identify your automatic thoughts and reformulate them as explained above.
How do I use these tools?
Schedule specific times, at least a few every week, for worry, rumination, and unhelpful thinking. You should set an exact time and timeframe for your rumination time (i.e. Monday, Wednesday, Friday from 6:00pm-6:30pm).
Some people benefit from daily worry/rumination time, but you can identify the frequency that works for you after trying it out. There is no right or wrong way to do this. Just find what works for you depending on your daily schedule. It may be helpful to mark this time in your calendar, as this makes it more likely that you will stick to the time. You can start with just 10-15 minutes, and you should aim for no more than 30 minutes.
Notice in your daily life when a bothersome or unhelpful thought arises outside of your worry time. Take a moment to acknowledge that a part of you is bringing up that thought for a reason—it’s trying to be helpful. Then write the thought down on paper or digitally, and reassure yourself that you will address it during your scheduled time.
If you write it down, you’ll have less of a sense that you have to keep thinking about the thought in order to not forget it, so this act may be helpful in itself!
Prioritize during your worry time the thoughts that are most important to address that day. Sometimes you might only have time to process one or two thoughts in your 15-30 minutes, and that’s okay! You can keep the other ones on your list and address them during your next time if needed. As the use of these tools becomes more habitual, you’ll be able to come up with helpful responses to your own thoughts faster and faster.
Reformulate during your worry time any questions or hypotheticals as definitive statements to help you address or challenge these thoughts. For example, “What if I get in a car accident?” or “I could get in a car accident” should be reformulated as “I will get in a car accident” to help you honestly address the probability/accuracy of the thought.
Reformulating your thoughts into statements is not meant to serve as a prediction or to say that your thought is correct; rather, in turning the thought into a definitive, we can more clearly look at it and assess its accuracy. You should then use the cognitive restructuring template and reflection questions above to come up with an alternative interpretation of this worry.
Transition Out of worry time at the end of your designated slot. It can be helpful to set a timer to hold yourself accountable to ending your time after up to 30 minutes. You might consider planning a specific activity to help transition you out of your head afterwards, such as taking a walk, calling a friend, reading a book, or cooking.
I’m not a worrier/ruminator. Do I still need to schedule time?
Not necessarily, though we recommend that you try it out for the next several weeks. Scheduling time may be a helpful opportunity for you to engage in the deliberate practice of addressing thoughts.
However, if you find that you are able to use the tools in the above flowchart “on the fly” once you have learned them well, you may not need to schedule time anymore. Experiment and do what works for you! And remember that if you ever do start feeling preoccupied by bothersome thoughts, you can start scheduling time again.
Am I allowed to use these skills outside of the scheduled time for worry/thinking?
Certainly — in fact, we encourage it! If you find that an unhelpful thought is bothering you as you go about your daily activities, and you have enough time and energy to address it right then, you can do so.
The ultimate goal is for this process to become faster and more automatic so that you can easily use it in everyday life. Still, keep in mind that constructive worry time is useful in part because it weakens the habit of immediately giving attention to distracting thoughts or worries the moment they arise.
So, take a moment to pause and ensure that you fully endorse giving attention to the thought in the moment, and be mindful of the risk that purposeful reflection can easily turn into repetitive rumination.
What if these thought-focused techniques don’t seem to be working, and I’m still preoccupied by thoughts?
Generating more helpful, alternative thoughts is one useful approach to rumination, but it's not your only option. You don’t have to “get rid” of thoughts in order to move forward with your life. You can also experiment with tools for embracing the thought, or at least coexisting with thoughts peacefully. For instance, you might:
Try assuming that the thought is true and planning how you can live a good life or cope anyway. This is sometimes called “coping ahead.”
Engage in gratitude practice: “I’m having this unpleasant thought, and also [insert thing I’m grateful for here],” or “This bad thing is happening, but I am grateful it’s not [insert worse thing here].”
Use tools for soothing your emotions and your body, covered in the week 5 pre-read on emotion regulation, until your brain is less stuck in the thought loop. This could take minutes or hours, depending upon your circumstance, but remember that you won’t feel like this forever!
Can cognitive restructuring fix my struggles such as procrastination permanently?
Cognitive restructuring isn’t a “fix-all,” but it’s a powerful tool to address the underlying thoughts that fuel a current struggle, such as procrastination. Combined with practical strategies, like breaking tasks into small steps or using timers, it can reduce procrastination and help you approach tasks more productively over time.
What if I don’t have time to do this exercise?
Cognitive restructuring doesn’t have to take long! Start with a 5-minute reflection where you write down just one thought, challenge it briefly, and replace it with a balanced alternative. Even small, time-bound efforts can make a difference in the long term.
Optional resources
Explanation of cognitive restructuring with several examples- Note that this resource includes the problem- solving part of the flowchart as a final step of cognitive restructuring, which is totally fine. You can figure out which version works best for you!
Explanation of cognitive defusion with several exercises (video, 20 min)
An alternative version of worry time that does not include cognitive restructuring (handout, 1 page)
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