Networking effortlessly: Tips from improv

Be present, curious & remember everyone is self-absorbed

I used to find networking incredibly nerve-wracking. What do I talk about? What if there are awkward silences? How do I end the conversation? were some of the thoughts running through my mind in advance of a networking chat. I knew networking was good for my career & professional growth, however each call left me with an elevated heart rate.

Luckily, this changed after I chatted with a mentor who told shared she highly recommended taking improv to feel more confident communication. I took my first improv class, and (1) learned there is a lot more to improv than improv comedy and (2) no longer felt so nervous when networking. If you find talking to new people stressful, I hope these tips can help.

Stop stockpiling

Before I took an improv class, I used to prepare a long list of questions in advance of networking that I could fall back on if needed during the chat. In improv, I learned this is called “Stockpiling” and it actually takes away from the conversation. I was shocked, I felt like stockpiling was the only strategy I had to keep me from becoming completely mute. However, I learned that when you stockpile, you limit yourself to that small set of questions you’ve prepared and you aren’t present since you are focused on the next question you’re going to ask.

Be present

Instead of stockpiling, you listen to the other person & respond based on what they are saying without over-thinking it. In improv comedy, this same principle leads to smooth transitions between ridiculous scenes. Imagine if in improv each person had funny pieces prepared; while each individual piece may be funny, it wouldn’t lead to the same humor that results when building on each other’s ideas. Similarly, when you stop stockpiling, conversation will flow more easily & lead to a much more authentic conversation. It seems counterintuitive, but less preparation & responding in the moment will lead to a much more genuine conversation & more enjoyable networking experience for you.

Everyone is human & self absorbed

Lastly, remember that regardless of the person’s title or company, they are still human. They have strengths and weaknesses, just like you. And, they were once in your shoes too, networking with someone to advance their career. If you get nervous, I always remind myself no new person I meet cares about me that much. Said differently, if I say something that “sounds stupid” or feel awkward during the chat, I can guarantee that after the chat while I might be reflecting on the negative qualities, the other person has moved on & their brain is full with other thoughts.

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I hope you find this helpful 🙂 If you want to chat 1-1 about networking, please

Contact me!

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