tag_ape's resume roast primer

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Roast my resume!
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Ugaliin po nating magbasa! Please check if your question has been answered here before sending me a message.

What’s a resume roast?

A “resume roast” or “resume critique” is an objective audit of your resume based on your target industry and your overall career goals.

Simply put, it’s a detailed review of your resume to increase your chances of getting hired.

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Are resumes really a big deal?

Recruiters usually get tens of hundreds of applications every day.

At best, they will only have 1-3 minutes to check your resume and judge if you’re worth passing to the next phase of the application process.

At worst, they’re using a tool that uses AI to check your resume.

Poorly made resumes don’t always mean a rejection, but a well-made resume will increase the chances of getting your foot in the door. It also helps set the tone for any interview, since it is the first impression the interviewer will have of you. So yes, they are a big deal.

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How does this work?

Hanggang saan aabot ang ₱250 mo? Check my

Sample Critique⁠

for a sneak peek.

The first thing you need to do is to fill out the

Resume Roast form⁠

Before paying, please take screenshots of your resume, and edit out any personal details like your name and address using your phone’s markup tool or Paint.

Once I have received your request and verified payment (within 24 hours), I will start working on your critique and will let you know once I’m done with it. I always do my research for every single resume, so it may take some time to finish yours.

You can expect your critique to be ready within 5-7 days. Your critique will be hosted as a document on Coda and will be available only to the email address you submitted in the form.

Please accept the Coda invite once it’s arrived in your inbox.

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Do you roast resumes for only freelancers?

No, I accept any resume for critique. Please understand, though, that the online/remote hiring space is more familiar to me than PH corporate hiring, so I won’t be able give the best critique.

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What are your qualifications?

I’m a Pinoy hiring manager (though that’s not my title) for an operations agency that hires both technical and non-technical roles for our clients. As the first barrier after the recruitment team, I interview at least 30 people a week and reject 60% of those candidates for various reasons.

For security, I’m choosing to stay anonymous and also expect anonymity from those who avail of my service.

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Why are you doing this?

I noticed that a lot of resumes from fellow Pinoys are a headache to read, so I offered a

limited free resume roast on Reddit⁠

last 2023. After I closed it, I received more than a hundred requests asking me to roast their resumes, with some even offering to pay ₱1000 for my service.

Now I’m reopening roasts for just ₱250, or the equivalent of a Jolibee Peach Mango Pie 6-pack.

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Why isn’t this free? When will you hold another free roast?

One thing that frustrated me when I launched the

free roast⁠

was that I was spending 15-20 minutes critiquing each resume, only for 85% of the requesters to ghost me after I sent it to them. Wala man lang silang “Thank you.”

Meanwhile, some requesters actually asked for my Gcash to thank me for spending so much time helping them. These were people who messaged me again after a few weeks saying they got hired for a job or finally started the career they wanted.

From that experience, I realized that many Pinoy freelancers need to learn to appreciate others’ time by actually paying for said labor. ₱250 is a fair price for my time (considering I usually get paid $12-15/hr for non-technical work) and is still within budget for most Pinoys.

As for the free roast, despite my unpleasant experience, I might hold it again either in December or early next year. I don’t do this full time and I don’t plan on being a career coach, so if you don’t want to pay, you’ll have to wait.

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Is my data safe?

Yes. Your data will not be shared with anyone else and will not be used for any other purpose.

In fact, to help protect your data, I will erase all the information you have given me (both the form submission and your critique) 30 days after I’ve sent it to your inbox.

I highly recommend creating a copy of the critique doc so you can keep it for your personal use.

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Can I ask you questions about how to start freelancing, where to get clients, etc?

Anong tawag natin sa mga tao na nag-oorder ng Peach Mango Pie sa Mcdo? Nagsisimula sa letrang ‘T.’

Yun. Please don’t be that ‘T’ person.

You can, but that is beyond the scope of my services. I’m not in the business of talking about things I know nothing about — you can go to the many scammer FB and Tiktok “career coach” influencers for that.

BTW, I have rejected my fair share of those influencers because all they knew was how to talk...and nothing else.

All I’m here for is to help fellow Pinoy freelancers improve their resumes. Nothing more, nothing less.

Unless it’s in line with my industry, I may choose to decline answering and will just redirect you to the

r/buhaydigital⁠

subreddit.

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