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Chances are you shouldn't do it

There I was, sitting in this big white hall. In front of me, an empty ocean of blue cushions, neatly organized by lines and rows. I counted 50 in total. At my left, another group of 50 blue cushions, for the male section - that hall is the only place where both genders share a space.

The other participants start arriving, in silence, and sit at their designated cushion - the butt companion; the cushion that, by the end of the 10 days, would be the closest physical connection all those humans would have experienced. I’m not paying attention to any instructions; there is one thing that I can't stop thinking about. I look around and I could count on one hand those who appear to be my age or younger. “Where are all the young people of the retreat? Did I join a middle-life-crisis convention and was not aware of it?”.

So I made myself a promise, which is what brings us to this. I, writing about my experience, without any pretension to evangelize, promote, or recommend - but only to do my small part in increasing awareness about Vipassana meditation and its starting point: a 10-day silent retreat.

Upfront, I want to give an important disclaimer. If you read this and decide to attend a Vipassana with any of the following motivations: it sounded cool; it's a nice story to tell; or because you think Sam Harris would be proud of you... You'll either quit the retreat (latest by day 5) or hate me - maybe both. I need to state this clearly. This is hard, it was hard on my first time, back in 2012, and it continued being hard 11 years later. But hey, if it is that hard, and I continue going back to it, there must be a good reason, right?

What is Vipassana?

I'll share my perspective from taking three courses as taught by S.N. Goenka, who product-packaged the technique (said to be the one used by Buddha) and expanded it from Myanmar to India, and later, to the world. You can have a much more detailed explanation (with better copywriting) here:

dhamma.org⁠

⁠

First, the website version:

"Vipassana, which means to see things as they really are, is one of India's most ancient techniques of meditation. It was rediscovered by Gotama Buddha more than 2500 years ago and was taught by him as a universal remedy for universal ills. This non-sectarian technique aims for the total eradication of mental impurities and the resultant highest happiness of full liberation. […] Vipassana is a way of self-transformation through self-observation."

TLDR; Vipassana is a meditation technique used to purify, clear, and sharpen your most important asset: your mind. Straight-up shooter, that's it. It is not woo-woo; there is no spirituality involved, although they will name-drop Buddha here and there. You don't visualize anything; there's no chanting or praying for something/someone. You are not allowed to take any religious artifact (no saints, tarot cards, crystals... you name it, leave it at home). To give you perspective, I attended this last course with a friend who has a Ph.D. in neuroscience and works for Israeli Intelligence - one of the most skeptical guys I know. It was his fourth course.

You will sign up for a meditation retreat where they will take you from 0 to meditator in 10 days. Thus, anything that does not contribute to that is not allowed - no reading, no writing, no speaking, or exercising. It is not group therapy, it is not a yoga retreat, and there is no one aligning your chakras. You are in a meditation retreat, and you will sit and meditate. That is the beauty and the struggle of it.

It will humble you. It will push you to the edge until you admit that you have no control over your mind. Once you accept that, every day you will experience massive improvements towards taming it, so you leave seeing the world with a level of clarity you've never experienced. I usually say that it is like spending a lifetime chopping wood with an OK ax until you learn how to sharpen it. There's no going back.

Now, before you chicken out because it will sound intense, it's essential to understand that every detail of the program is thought through and designed to deliver results. Effectiveness and shallowness can’t co-exist in the world of the mind.

So who is this for?

I attended my first course at 18 years old while backpacking in India. I was clueless about what Vipassana was and how it worked. A friend asked if I wanted to join, and I remember thinking, “Sounds like a cool thing to do while in India”. I had never even tried to sit and meditate before.

In retrospect, being inexperienced was something that played to my advantage. I had no vices, no habits from other techniques; my mind was a blank canvas. In case you are wondering if you could do it without much practice, I’d say that’s the best way to not only learn how to meditate, but how to quickly create a solid base that you can translate as a habit outside the retreat, too.

The reason why beginners tend to drop meditation, IMO, is that they don’t put in the hours to reach the other side. Those 20 minutes/day of the Calm app are a great way to remove friction, but it would take you 360 days to cover 120 hours of meditation, which is the total amount you cover in a 10-day Vipassana retreat.

As with everything in life, there is no ONE path (is there a path?). Find the way that benefits *you* and be happy.

How does one know if it’s time to do it?

I want you to do a self-check-in. To the best of your abilities, pay attention to those last few seconds before you fall asleep - when your mind interchanges dance partners between your conscious and subconscious: can you experience peace? At that intimate moment between you and your pillow, do you feel aligned? When the day is over and you prepare for the same yesterday with tomorrow’s name, were you even there? Are you paying attention to life?

Suppose answering the questions above left you uncomfortable. If you feel like life is too loud and you can’t hear yourself. That your mind is running you and not you running it. Those are some of the signs that you could benefit from attending a Vipassana retreat. Many were the benefits I got from the experience. Yet, I’d be misleading you by overpromising a one-pill solution to all your problems - chances are you don’t even want to solve them anyway… humans love having something to complain about (sorry, not sorry).

Moreover, each retreat gave me the benefits and breakthroughs I needed at a specific moment in my life. It is all highly contextual. That is one more reason for the program to be in silence: there is no space for comparison with others - all the fun happens between you and your mind.

Why I find Vipassana special

I’m an inquisitive individual. I want to try it all, and live it all - thus, I have explored a fair amount of consciousness expansion tools throughout my life. Vipassana always goes to the podium. Why?

The technique teaches you to be aware of your body sensations and observe them with equanimity. What will happen next is that a new universe will open for you; a universe you’ve been living in and were not aware of. You will be paying attention. As you uncover the deep connections of mind and matter, you’ll learn how to de-somatize your body by using your mind (hard to explain, you need to experience it).

While practicing it, you are not supposed to play intellectual games. There are no benefits in seeking rational explanations behind what you are experiencing. The benefit comes from integrating the wisdom of impermanence - all sensations, all feelings, emotions, and experiences… have the same characteristic: they arise and fade away.

It is easy - and tempting - to seek input and call it growth. Reading, listening, consuming, and making intellectual sense of life do not guarantee you a better living. You will know, but you won’t understand. You will rationalize a lot, but there won’t be wisdom there. Theory alone is insufficient; you need to involve the body to achieve depth of change - it needs to be chemical as well (shout out to breathwork, another favorite of mine).

TLDR on reasons why I appreciate Vipassana:

It trained me to see reality as it is.

It has a significant focus on the interconnection of mind and matter.

It took me to a very high state of consciousness, very fast.

It is a secular practice.

I’ve experienced my meditation at the body level, which I never did in other practices;

5H2W - being more practical:

- The beginner’s course is a 10-day program. Less than that, you won’t experience relevant breakthroughs and will leave the retreat annoyed. Why? The mind needs approximately 3 days to adjust, where you stop tripping about the past, the future, work, relationships, whether AI will take over the world, or whatever your friends are doing that Friday night. Only after those initial days did I feel fully present - and thus, my practice strengthened. There is a build-up that happens until days 7-8, where some internal shift happens, and so you have days 8-10 to maximize it. More than 10 is too much, less than that, too little.

- Very important: the program, the schedule, and the content are standardized globally. It doesn't matter where you take the course; you will have the same experience. Maybe some centers have a better infrastructure or nicer food, but that would be the only difference. There is an Association (dhamma.org) where you can see the center closest to you and their course schedule.

- I want to give a special highlight to the fact that the program is free. Yep, you read that. You'll sleep, eat, shower, and receive all the lessons for free. The business model? At the end of the program, if you can and like, you are invited to leave a donation to support the program for future students. This is not mandatory and is not pushy; instead, it aims to be as inclusive as possible. I find that pretty awesome.

- The schedule: I am so grateful I didn't know the schedule before my first one; otherwise, I might have backed down. So, all I'll say is that the schedule is by design, thought out in a way that will benefit you. There are breaks, rest periods, and delicious meals, and you can always seek the organizers for support.

- The silence: Well, not speaking for 10 days does not equal having silence for 10 days, best regards - your mind. lol

Some general comments

I received tons of questions about my takeaways, learnings, and the challenges I faced during the retreat. Truth be told, it doesn’t matter. Even if I were to write it, you’d know it on an intellectual level and would not be able to embody the lesson, so I’d be doing you a disservice. Secondly, I don’t want to prime or influence your experience if you are to take the next step in this journey of self-discovery.

Amiguitos, whether we like it or not, we carry our minds with us 24/7. We go around our days creating narratives to justify a self-deceptive reality. Being unable to see reality as it is. Right now, you are running millions of mental patterns that determine your life - and there you are wondering what to watch on Netflix.

I’m no Bodhisattva. Vipassana is not a tool for everyone - it is not the only one I have, either. But it is a powerful tool that has the potential to deliver real breakthroughs - thus it can’t be shallow to be effective. One thing I can attest to for sure is: this has always offered a depth of transformation and benefit to my life that I care enough to be writing this.

What’s next?

Think through it before deciding whether to take the next step. If you choose to go ahead, I’m excited for you! Visit dhamma.org, search for the location nearest you, and view the available dates.

If there is anything specific you’d like me to add, feel free to reach out on IG (I’m fortunate to change WhatsApp numbers often), and I’ll update the text. Happy to answer more personal questions on a private note as well.

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