Over time I started to feel resistance from you when I wanted to gain momentum or collaborate on certain things that had been emerging based on the needs of the Atlan field, and even a culmination of what we had been working towards shifting. I mentioned it to you and La a few times, and your response was that you felt I was dominating the field. Once this occurred enough times, I realized that what was actually taking place is that this was a projection from you and La who were wanting to do things differently, and even didn’t truly value and honor me stepping into leadership at times.
So instead of finding the middle ground and exploring a collaborative pathway forward, the two of you actually dominated the by field by coming into coherence with one another and not being fully transparent with me about things - thus gaining momentum and coherence in the direction the two of you began paving the way for. You both also began to show up in collaboration with me in a different energy that was much less receptive and even undermining of my work a bit and what I was trying to get done. This feels like the same pattern that took place with Norm and La, which ended up over powering everyone several times around different major decisions and things that would get presented.
Below are several points of awareness I would like to share in support of this energy that begin to take its own form. Not to mention this is a core pattern of Atlan.
Additional Points of Awareness
You have been having meetings outside of our Operations Pod meetings with others and not informing me of the conversations, and feel you have been deliberately not sharing with me. This on top of you and LA having meetings and building coherence around things without tuning me in and bringing me up to date began to shift the coherence of the field that we have been cultivating for the last 7 months.
During these few weeks while what I mentioned above was taking place I began to observe a pattern of where I would share things with you based on what I was seeing or feeling around the development of Atlan, and you would not fully integrate it in a way that would honor or value what I was saying, while the way you would show up was with very little presence and capacity. And the things you did deem valuable, what I experienced was you taking it and repurposing it from which then you could advocate for it as if it was now coming from you. Once you collected what you needed and repurposed it you were then ready to move on from the conversation. This is a pattern that Norm also does and has doen with Keala. This happened several times and in a very particular sequence each time. It felt off considering you used to integrate very deeply what I would share and we would dialogue about it and then come into a consensus after a little bit of back and forth. To me this felt much more interconnected and emphasized the potential of our collaboration to be very co-supportive and complimentary. T
The last few times I asked you about updates from your conversations with others you basically said and insinuated that it was important to our conversation. To me it felt as if you actually didn't want to distribute the awareness that you had, as it was giving you a sense of power and control that you were becoming aware of how you could harness it for your own personal agenda - which is exactly what ended up happening.
I also genuinely feel that you while you were gaining this sense of power from all the awareness and coherence you were building outside the context of me being involved, you didn't have a real desire to re-integrate with me around things cause you were perhaps afraid I would slow down your flow. This goes back to the initial conversation we had for two hours regarding how the way I was seeing a pattern emerge that wasn’t going to work for me on top of the fact we had no spiritual practice together. Mind you this was was catalyzed by me slowing you down for a moment to just get more information and be able to align together around the priority - which made you super uncomfortable as your clearly not used to that considering you pretty much call the shots for everyone in your life from family to business. You ended up expressing how you disassociate sometimes to get things done and could see how that could affect me.
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